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Twas the Mission Before Christmas/Transcript

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This page is a transcript for Twas the Mission Before Christmas. Please add to the contents of this page, but only sentences and parts that pertain to the episode Twas the Mission Before Christmas.

This is a transcript of the episode Twas the Mission Before Christmas. It's still under construction.

Transcript

Tasha: Donald, I just noticed the holiday card we mailed out. What happened to the family portrait we took to celebrate our first Christmas together?

Donald: Oh, I shredded those, these are way more festive.

Adam: Who wants a Christmas cookie?

Leo: Adam, those aren't even cooked!

Adam: Oh, no problem. (activates his laser eyes and burnes the cookies) Careful, they may be hot!

(Bree enters the house)

Bree: Okay. Who covered the entire house in blinking lights? People already think we're weird, we don't need to shine a light on it!

Adam: I did that! I want to make sure Santa Claus comes to our house first!

Bree: Adam, we all love Christmas, but I think you're going a little overboard.

(Chase bangs on the door and then enters, tied in blinking lights)

Bree: (laughs with Chase) That, hovever, is spot-on.

Adam: (to Chase) Hey! Get back above the roof, you're ruining my display!

Chase: You were lucky, I raccoon chewed me free!

(The mission alert goes off)

Donald: That's an urgent mission alert, we have to get to the lab.

(Donald, Adam & Bree rush to the lab, but Chase can't move)

Chase: (still standing) Hello! A little help?

(Chase tries to hop to the lab, but stumbles behind the couch)

Donald: The alert is coming from Facility X, my research center at the frozen tundra.

Leo: Hey, hey, I'm the mission specialist, I'll handle this! The alert is coming from Facility X, his (points at Donald) research center at the frozen tundra.

Adam: Wait... The tundra's near the North Pole... Santa needs our help! You (points at Bree) wrap, you (points at Chase) tape, I'll go hang with the elves!

Donald: Dr. Evans, are you there?

Dr. Evans: Yeah, I'm here! Although... There's been a major vulcanic eruption nearby and we're experiencing aftershocks! I'm afraid if we don't act fast... (communication fails)

Adam: Oh, Merry Christmas to you too, Dr. Evans! Rude!

Donald: Sorry gyus, I know the time's not ideal.

Chase: It's okay, Mr. Davenport, we know what we have to do.

Adam: Yep. Let's crack open some eggnog and hit it hard after the New Year! (runs back up, probably to get eggnog)

(Theme song plays)

Leo: I can't believe you guys have to go on a mission on Christmas Eve. (to Donald) Just to be clear, I don't have to wait for them to open MY presents, right?

Adam: Well, I'm not going to let this ruin my Christmas spirit, so I'll be wearing... my Santa hat!

Chase: Really, Adam? A Santa hat with a mission suit?

Adam: Hey, if the ladies at the bank can wear them at work, so can I!

Donald: I can't re-establish contact with Dr. Evans, the volcano must have knocked out sattelite communications. It's giant ash-cloud has plunged the area into total darkness. There is no way rescue teams will be able to get through.

Bree: Well, that means Dr. Evans is trapped.

Adam: He's better off, the airports are packed this time-a-year.

Donald: There's an automated transport ready to take you up there, but without sattelite communications, Leo and I won't be on the comset.

Chase: Well, it will be tough navigating through a mission without the constant sound of Leo chumping on carrot sticks.

Leo: (eating a carrot) Hey! You know I'm a stress-eater!

(Next scene. House bell rings. Leo and Tasha are in the living room)

Leo: Oh, I got it. Must be grandma with her holiday fees, well perhaps, some carolists have come to spread some holiday cheers. (opens the door) Merry-

Principal Perry: Hey Dooley.

Leo: Aah! (quicly closes the door) Call hey. Turn off the lights. Everybody hide.

Tasha: Leo! (opens the door for Principal Perry) Hi.

Donald: I'm with him, I'll be behind the tree.

Principal Perry: Sorry to bother you, but I ran into some car trouble while doing one of my favorite utile traditions.

Tasha: Oh, you were driving around looking at Christmas lights?

Principal Perry: No! I was tearing through peddles trying to splash carollers. Took a corner to fast and accidentally ran over some of your decorations. (shows a Santa decoration with a big ugly tyre mark) Ho-ho-ho, here you go.

Donald: (takes the ruined decoration) I see. Were you driving a tractor?

(...)

Adam: Hey guys, look! A giant crystal ball, I'm gonna ask it a question! (Starts rubbing it) When will Chase start to look like a man?

Dr. Evans: Aah, careful, careful! It's a gamma sphere.  It's a containment vessel for the most powerful source of energy known to men. Gamma rays. If we can harness these, we can solve the world's energy problems. Davenport and I have been working on this for years.

Chase: Wowowowo. Iwas trying to develop a gamma sphere for Mr. Davenport.

Dr. Evans: Well, I guess I beat you to it, little guy. But don't feel bad. Nobody's perfect. In fact, if they gave out medals for trying, you would have a gold!

Chase: Are you petronizing (sic) me?

Dr. Evans: Hahahaha... It's patronizing. And yes!

Chase: You do realize I'm the smartest person on the planet?

Dr. Evans: Mmm. And every time you have to say it, it diminishes it just a little bit. (makes a shrinking gesture with his fingers)

Bree: (to Adam) Are you watching this?

Adam: I can't look away.

Dr. Evans: Luckily, the sphere wasn't damaged during the eruption, even the slightest crack could have had catastrophic consequences.

Adam: Like what?

Dr. Evans: The gamma-rays would have blown a hole in the athmosphere, and wiped out 20% of the population. 

Bree: Well, that is Davenport Industries, risking the fate of mankind since 1992!

Chase: Come on, Dr. Evans, we gotta get you outta here!

Dr. Evans: Whoa, I can't leave until I've stabilized a few things, If you all help me this won't take very long.

Chase: Oh it won't take long. Because I'm smart!

Dr. Evans: You said it again. (makes the shrinking gesture again)

(...)

(commercials)

Dr. Evans: Wow, don't get too close. If that crack opens up, those gamma rays will mix with the ash cloud and... say goodbye northern hemisphere!

Chase: Can we patch the crack?

Dr. Evans: Patch the crack? Billion-dollar technology, unstable energy source... Sure, let's put a little chewing gum in there and see if that works.

Chase: Startin' to see why the hologram-wife left.

Adam: Hey, how about I shoot my heat vision at it?

Bree How would that help?

Adam: I don't know, it's what I do!

(The crack gets worse)

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